Motherhood doesn’t come with a rule book

 Being a new mom, I was told that its just matter of first three months of parenting and then life will be smooth. I had this thought, ‘may be motherhood comes with a rule book’.  The first three months would be challenging. Being a first time mother I had taken this literally. Then I met few more acquaintances who told me that for initial six months you need to be rock solid and then see the difference. I felt that every one had their own perspective.

Perspective of a mother at different phases

When mother’s used to share their experiences of handling different situations I was confident about one thing that what works for one child may not work for other child. I was always aware about it being into this field but after entering into motherhood I was more confident.

My daughter turned one and I met one mom who was mother to a four year old kid and she told me that now the difficult phase of parenting begins. She meant that once the child starts walking one has to be very careful as the child might bang here and there. I have had mother’s around me who often tells me that they find days when the child starts schooling parenting becomes very difficult. That’s when I realised, motherhood definitely comes with a rule book.

Mother’s also feel that the child psychology needs to revamped as all the theories related to child development are not at all related to the current scenario of the children.

Handling challenging situations

I believe that certain theories of child development does make lot of sense and we as a parent need to have lots of patience and perseverance in what we do. I like to listen to different perspective of every mom and then learn from their achievements and mistakes. At the end of the day if you are a working mother or stay at home mother, you should feel happy with what you are. That’s the most important things of motherhood which matters the most irrespective of the age your child. Because motherhood doesn’t come with a rule book.

Be ready with new strategy

Yes there are days when you cant cope up with certain situation but then think as if you are ready to play a new game so drink water and try a new move instead of feeling that game is over. I have felt like a winner while inculcating so many habits in my daughter. I look forward to share in my future articles.

First three months 

I agree that for me so far the first three months were the most challenging. Everyday was like a check mate especially the 2nd month. Since I stay nuclear I remember those days when I used to get confused what does my child want and I often used to feel that I am a bad mother. I failed to understand if my lo(little one) wanted to sleep or drink milk. There was self doubt most of the times. But yes my lo never kept me awake at night so I was blessed. I had consciously worked on certain aspects which made sure that my lo should sleep throughout the night. I will share in future blogs. Today I feel proud that I have been able to do so many things systematically like Inculcating good sleeping habits, Weaning, bonding etc.

So if you are new mother remember that motherhood doesn’t come with a rule book. Please ponder on below mentioned points-

1) Motherly instincts are very important
2) Moral Support is very important be it from your husband, caretaker, mom, mother in law or any one else
3) You have given birth to your child so now raise him happily
4) Grass is often greener on other side so stop comparing growth of your child with anyone else’s
5) Please spend few minutes in a day with yourself
6) These golden days of motherhood will not come back
7) Respect the needs of your child

New mom, new child, new approach

If you are a Father or any other member of the family who is reading this please understand that now the child is out from the womb and even you can give helping hands to the mother.

Please give moral support to the new mom. Be with her when she requests you. Kindly understand about the needs of the child together and don’t just let the mom be responsible for parenting.

Many a times parenting is all about trial and error. Sometimes you are successful and other days you might want to try something new. And with every new day you learn something new about your child.

What works for one child may not work for other child. Yes we can always take suggestions from other mom’s and use our own discretion.

After all motherhood doesn’t come with a rule book. 

Yes there are days when you cant cope up with certain situation but then think as if you are ready to play a new game so drink water and try a new move instead of feeling that game is over. I have felt like a winner while inculcating so many habits in my daughter. I look forward to share in my future articles.



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